Christmas 2020

Today, is my family’s tenth Christmas without Daddy’s physical presence. Smarter people can speak to the concept of time, the lingering absence at one’s core never to be filled, and all the other experiences following the passing of a loved one. I am grateful to know the love that endures beyond the grave.

This is also the first Christmas that my mother is away from home. After a recent hospitalization, she is undergoing rehab in a nursing home. The days of her baking cakes for this holiday are long gone but the tastes and aromas are emblazoned in our memories as is the temptation of waiting to cut the favorite delectables at the designated time.

The highlight of this Christmas was two days early as my siblings, nephew and I stood wearing masks to visit Mama through the window of her nursing home room. She was awake and alert not fully aware of why we didn’t enter her room.

It was a beautiful winter day with blue skies, low humidity, and warm temperature. What I would not do to trade the perfection of that day for one more Christmas with my parents in good health and at home — where my lived experience included the incarnation of love that is celebrated on Christmas.